Being Two Years and One Month is Irrestibly Delicious (apart from the Drooling)

This little guy turned two at the beginning of April, and a whole world of cuteness has suddenly opened up in the form of him speaking a lot more.  He's also getting his molars through so I've had quite a few "not very maternal" moments.  And am permanently covered in drool.

I'm Turner and he's Hooch.

Cute things that he has said in the past month include but are not limited to:

"Where are you going?" "Shops"
"Are you taking the dinosaur toys?" "Yes"
"What do they need from the shops?" "Biscuits"

"Mmm, these (completely imaginary) cakes are delicious, what did you make them with?"
"Hands"

"What was that noise?"
(without looking up) "Faaart"

(Trying to get his Polish Grandad to dance)
"Come on Dzadzio"

(When I do something that meets his approval)
"Well done Mummy" "Clever Mummy" "Yes, Mummy" "Good, Mummy"

(When I do something that does not meet his approval)
"No, Mummy" "Silly Mummy" "Daddy, my Daddy"

(When he's filled his nappy)
"Daaady, Poooooo"

His insistence on saying "Hello" and "Bye bye" to everything - cats, cars, "A moon", "A man" and anyone who leaves the room.

I've just re-read this post and realised it's not that interesting, but I don't really care because I think it's adorable and hilarious.

I probably need to get out more.

And stop making references to little remembered 80's cop-dog buddy movies.

Now where's my copy of K-9?

Have I got another one in me?........

A friend recently said she had her third child, despite quite an age gap "because she just felt like she had another one in her"

This is, I think, a great way to describe the greedy, greedy biological clock that is my body.

In the words of R Kelly, "my mind's telling me no, but my body's telling me yes....."

We have three amazing babies.  I survived two pregnancies virtually painlessly.  We are all happy and healthy.  A family of five is enough to feel big without being unmanageable.  We haven't priced ourselves out of nice family holidays.  We're outnumbered but we can handle it.  My body is getting back to normal, I'm running again. The planet is already over-populated enough.

My brain tells me all of these things.

My tragic, melodramatic body says

"But you'll never breastfeed again, you'll never have the joy of growing a human being inside you, you'll never go through childbirth again, you'll never again hold your tiny newborn in your arms and feel all the love in the world"*

Hmmm.

I'm feeling incredibly empathetic towards those women in their thirties whose bodies turn against them.  There they are, enjoying good careers, fancy clothes, casual relationships and lots of lovely wine when suddenly, their treacherous body starts demanding they sniff babies heads and browse the Little White Company catalogue.

Ugh.  Yet again, being a woman has some stinking downsides.

I'm going to keep ignoring my ridiculous, demanding ovaries and the voice of baby number four (I think she's blonde and called Matilda) and crack on with looking after the three I've got. 

And one day, I might be able to persuade myself that three really is enough.  Probably the next time I'm in Clarks buying shoes....

*My body knows full well that I hate being pregnant, breastfeeding makes me feel like a dairy cow and I was so tired/ drugged up after having babies by "assisted" means that I never got that "moment" with any of them.

A 10 minute blog

I've got a work call at 9 and the babies are asleep.  I'm all set up "business-like" with a coffee and clean hair to talk about my return to work.

I'm 10 minutes early so I thought I'd quickly tap out some words and see how far I get in that time.

I was thinking yesterday about the things you could add to your CV if maternity leave was considered valid work experience.

Productivity would definitely rate very highly.  I have learnt to be so much more productive with my time since having kids.  I'm much more realistic about what can be achieved in allocated periods of time. 

We add complications to our lives over the years - ask any woman with a full time job, a few kids, nice hair and good relationship - your life is so full, its fit to burst.  To keep juggling all the elements effectively, no minute can be wasted.  It's as though everyone in your life is billing by the hour and you're the client watching the budget like a hawk.

I don't take sugar in my tea any more - it was taking too long.

I like multi functional beauty products.

I look for kids clothes that don't have fiddly buttons.

I cook one pot meals.

I can write a short blog post in 10 minutes.